To say they are my whole world would be dishonest: They are a big part of my world, but my identity is more than just Mom.
This picture says a lot to me. Porter quietly endures, Liam looks for Porter’s attention, and Oliver laments because he feels so alone, the only one in the family mostly cut off from friends.
I wanted three kids since high school. I didn’t bargain for three boys, but I would not have it any other way, now. After so many years of thinking it would just be four of us, our third found his way into the world.
I am not a perfect mom. I am not a classroom mama. I usually send Dad when there are treats that need to be sent to the classroom, or if there is something forgotten that needs to make its way to the classroom. I make them ride the bus rather than sit in the car rider line waiting for them, though that may change a little this year with Porter starting high school band. I am not a cook. I don’t hover while they do homework, knowing every detail of every assignment. I don’t make it to every soccer practice, or every game.
But, I like to think I meet my kids where they are. That is my goal, anyway.
Porter is my quiet, mature thinker, but we have a sense of humor in common. He doesn’t seek out affection but he sure does welcome it when it finds its way to him. Liam just wants to be with friends and he savors time spent as a whole family, as well, frequently requesting game nights (he asked for one tonight, in fact, and we’ll play his request, Game of Life). And, Oliver is my renegade cuddler– he is a wanna-be tough-guy with a heart of gold who loves to play pretend, loves to laugh, with a heart for Mama (and his bff, who happens to be a girl).
Mom is not my whole identity, but it is a privilege to have it be a part of who I am.